The Babushka Bomb…
This story relates to the age-old advice that we get from our fathers. They say to us: “If you want to know what your girl is going to look like when she gets older, just look at her mother and you will know.”
This leads me to the title of this chapter. I want you to look back in your life and try to remember all the hot Russian chicks you have known. I mean some of these chicks are so hot that I want to puke in my shoes when I see them.
Young Russian women are infamous for being some of the sexiest chicks on the planet. Truth be told, I think that they are the hottest when they are hot. But allow me to pose this question to you:
How many hot Russian women do you know over the age of 40?
Don’t bother. I know the answer. NONE!
The bomb
The Babushka Bomb
What happens to these beautiful girls? Well, I have a suggestion. As Russian girls pass through their thirties, somewhere back in the Homeland, a military unit begins focusing their sniper sights on them. Fuck, they probably use satellites and all that shit you see in the movies. Whatever. And then, once these formerly vomit-inducing beauties pass the big Four-Oh. WHAM! They are hit with the Babushka Bomb.
Their asses grow at a much faster rate than any other part of their body. Their taste in clothes and shoes starts regressing. Seriously, since when were those high-heel-flip-flop shoes in vogue? What on earth makes a woman with dark eyebrows think that peroxide blonde hair with dark roots is attractive? And what about the ones who gain fifty pounds? Does fifty pounds in weight come with a clause that forces one to cut ones hair like a eight year old boy? It is truly one of the greatest falls from grace that I can think of. Lucifer, watch out, we have a contender.
Aside: While first and foremost a Russian weapon, the Babushka Bomb may, at some point, have found its way into the hands of Spain, China, and Mexico. These countries should also be explored with great precaution. While their women are stunning in their younger years, Old Man Time is not kind, not kind at all. Marry at your own risk!
Don’t ever, ever pass up an opportunity to sleep with a hot, young girl, but don’t be a fool and fall in love.
Advice: No matter how hot they are, beware of the Babushka Bomb. You should probably assume that it is aimed at almost every woman you meet.
Unless you have done some serious research. I mean Family Trees and shit. Details. Find out anything and everything you can about the chicks’ genetic code, because more than likely she comes with an expiration date. Bang ‘em when they’re young, man, bang ‘em when they’re young…
Commentary, JBIC, Men's Interest, Misadventures in Dating - The Book
I’d also suggest checking out why she looks good to begin with. Is she naturally thin, or does she work out a lot? A girl who puts in the effort now is more likely to put in the effort later and stay looking good longer.
^^ He makes a good point. While the mother may have some “old world” habits…any smart first generation broad living in NYC knows that shit isn’t gonna cut it, so they start cultivating some “new world” discipline so they don’t fall apart by 29.5.
You should see my mom – she’s Russian – and she still gets hit on by guys my age (mid/late-20’s) because she is a freaking knock out – and she still is in LOVE with Christian Louboutin and Jimmy Choos shoes (doesn’t own a pair of flip-fops)…so there are exception to every Russian-woman-rule
@RSSNGirl Ahh but there is one rule with no exception….
@Casual Dater
…that being?
@Casual Dater
Yeah, I’d also like to hear it.
@BL1Y @RSSNGirl Gold diggers… Although that statement is based on the Brooklyn Russians…
@Casual Dater
This one definitely doesn’t apply to my mom/parents. My mom actually makes double the money my dad does. So, again, there are exceptions.
@Casual Dater
That’s not so much a rule as it is a noun.
There are some women who are born with that frame of mind. The majority of women aren’t, which is why Casual decided to post about it.
As far as gold diggers are concerned, I may get shot for this, but every woman is a gold digger one way or another.
and yes, i am a woman. A woman that casual hasn’t fucked.
As much as I hate the gold digger, there is a difference between being taken cared of and expecting everything to be handed to you because you can put your legs up on the air.
Dude, at least we look naturally stunning at some point of our lives and our looks make you drool and jerk off. Every nation has trailer park looking ladies wearing world knows what. Not to mention that Americans are so fat (even before reaching 30) that your desperation drives you to explore other nations. As for the gold digger – everyone is on a quest for a better life – even you, Casual. I bet you wouldn’t get involved with a burgerking chick no matter how hot she may appear (I mean relationship)
@natasha Naturally stunning? In NY most if not all the Russian women have make up plastered onto their faces. The closest I have ever seen to a naturally stunning Russian woman was in fact a Lithuanian woman…
Natasha you should also read the “Advice” section where I basically said it’s only the Ruski’s that may fall victim to the babushka Bomb.
By the way I’m not American…
I don’t think MOST women are “naturally stunning” – ALL women use SOMETHING to enhance their beauty.
Gold diggers – there are PLENTY of American gold diggers. I agree with you CD on the difference of being cared for and expecting everything just because… But for some reason, men seem to be intimated by women that have their own successful career, intelligent and do not expect anything (material/paying bills/etc.) from a man, but companionship. I have experienced that rich men tend to use money as their power over women and if you do not abide, they will find someone who will.
Question: how come men have a problem with dating a woman who makes more than they do?
@Casual Dater are these “Russian” women Jewish?
@RSSNGirl I go for the aggressive, man eating women. If you have the brains to match the looks then that is the day this blog is done.
Haven’t met a woman that does, hence I can’t answer that one.
As to whether of not they are Jewish; some are, some aren’t and some say they are, but aren’t…
@Casual Dater Well, a RUSSIAN woman is NOT Jewish – Russians are Orthodox.
However, in some of your posts, you said you have met smart and beautiful women, but the blog is still rolling….so, what was about them that didn’t qualify them to continue on?
I guess it would be hard for you to meet a woman that makes more than you do…
@RSSNGirl Well as I said in my MO even the smartest woman is dumb sometimes.
To answer your question, those smart women became a cliche.
CD, of course you are not American. Most likely, Indian. Get out of NY and explore the world of Russkis, as you put it. Perhaps, some stereotypes would be erased from your brain… but wait, can you really afford a hot Russian chick who respects herself enough not to fall for a cliche.
RSSNGirl, if you really are an outcome of ex-Soviet blood – I expected more from you. Darling, religion has nothing to do with the aging process and an appetite for cash.
For both of you: regardless of sex, a self-respecting, confident person is looking for his/her match on at LEAST the same level.
@natasha Natasha, not Indian either doll. Think somewhere in between. I can only assume you fail to see the point of this blog. So let me clue you in, I live, work and play in NYC, hence these are my views on the NY dating scene, sprinkled with tales of jaunts to other cities\countries when the time arises. Sadly I have never met a Russian chick that presented much of a challenge, they seem to roll over quite easily with minimal effort.
To address your comment to RSSNGirl, as I pointed out above, there is a significant difference between wanting to be taken cared of and being a gold digger. To use a NY Brooklyn stereotype, the Russian chick would be in a huge fur coat in the blistering heat of summer to show off what her Flavor of the Hour bought for her.
There is a reason I typically date Brazilian, Greek and Italian, all sexual people. Not prudes by any measure. Most importantly they are honest to themselves as to what they are.
Natasha, with that said, if you are at least a sober 8, then I’d be happy to wine you, dine you and blog you…
Cheers Doll
-CD
@natasha I am not relating religion to the “aging process” – but to how Jewish people are with money. Yes, it is a stereotype, and one that has proven to be right every time in my book. Judge me as you please, but I have yet to meet a Jewish person who was not greedy and was ready to take you for all you have without so much as a blink – great example: Madoff!
And, CD is RIGHT about those stereotypes. MANY Russian women are gold diggers and do fall for the “cliches” – I have plenty of “friends” back in Russia who are just in search of a man to support them. But then again, there are lots of American women as well who are just looking for a man to support them -”DABAs”. This stereotype just falls under a WOMAN.