The Finance Guys or Lack Thereof…
Admittedly this post started off as a reply to a comment on Harper’s blog. Thinking it got a bit long in the tooth I decided to just digress here on my own space where I can use the colorful language you all know, love and expect.
It all started with a chick on Harper’s blog saying she was in Finance, which got me to thinking. Now how many of you chicks and chickits have been hit on by some douche who says he is in fi-nance, and is really something below a Banker, Trader or Executive Management?
If your hand is down, turn off your computer take a large dildo and stick it up your fucking ass because you are full of fucking shit!
I saw a friend of mine at the beer garden on Sunday, she told me she just met a banker, blah blah fucking blah and she wanted me to come meet him. Turns out he is my analyst.
Now I knew this little shit and I couldn’t really give a shit to blow up his spot (the whole bros before hoes thing I guess) so I gave him the opportunity to tell her what he really is or I would, instead he moved on to find another chick. Fine, no foul, play ball.
Here is the hierarchy as I know it;
- Executive Management
- Banker/Trader (although traders are sniveling coke heads, they deserve their dues)
- quants (analysts, usually in cubicles or windowless rooms in sub-basement C)
Anything else is just some other profession that doesn’t matter. Hell I put my assistant before the quants.
Advice: To all you Daba/DABIT’s, remember, all that glitters isn’t gold. Just because he’s in Fi-nance, doesn’t mean is is making the bank you believe think he is making.
- Yes, he can get you into certain spots
- Yes, he can shell out for that bottle of Vodka you pass along to your friends
- Yes, he may even be able to put your feet in those red soled heels you so desperately seek to compliment the DvF draped over that french lingerie that is wrapping the most subtle pieces of flesh your body has to offer.
I guarantee he cant give you all of the above and more, especially in the frequency to which you require it.
Albeit, if he is good at what he does his stock price may increase and he may even be promoted to head chimp. But remember, he will always be an analyst.
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